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"Star Treatment," it's not...

Friday, September 19, 2008

PPPS. Prince does not demand this kind of Star Treatment.


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Friday, September 19, 2008

PPS. Salma Hayek does not need anger management.


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Friday, September 19, 2008

PS. Pamela Anderson is not blowing second chances even though the Filthy Scab blows everything else.


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"Blowing Second Chances," it's not...

Thursday, September 18, 2008

PS. Hilary Swank is not blowing second chances.


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http://www.laineygossip.com/Star_Treatment.aspx?IsMicro=0

How does he roll?

Private plane on someone else’s dime with specific requests about the type of aircraft…like it’s not enough to bypass commercial flying, you need to fly in a particular model. But that’s just the beginning.

He can only travel in matching (like MATCHING!) SUVs with police escort. Three of them. One left empty. And then a sedan. Why the sedan? Because his lower level staff are not allowed to ride in SUVs. They are beneath SUVs. His staff must also stay in a hotel separate from his.

Then there’s eye contact. No eye contact under any circumstances. If his driver happens to have to idle for more than 15 seconds with him in the car – say they’re packing up gear, or waiting for a delivery – the driver must exit the vehicle until the fleet is ready to move.

Speaking to him of course is out of the question. Speaking in his vicinity is even worse. The only voice he wants to hear is his own. You can talk…but only when he gives you permission. There’s actually a hand signal for that. It comes from his manager.

Hotel staff learn this lesson quickly. Imagine asking someone if he wants fresh towels and have him stare back at you, behind sunglasses, not answering, the silence filling up the room like a flood, how small that person must feel, that person who works and busts her ass for minimum wage, not even to be acknowledged, to feel the message from a millionaire that she is not worth engaging? Not even a nod?

If he walks past you in the hall, you must turn your back. If you don’t turn your back he’ll stop walking. His team will stand in a wall around him for fear that you might breathe on him. Worse still, they will harass you. They will intimidate you. They will treat you like a criminal and report you to make sure you are punished.

All of this and more, communicated without shame, without embarrassment, executed as though it’s the most natural way to behave … these are His Rules.

Thursday, September 18, 2008 at 9:03 AM

Update (11/26/08):
denial 1: Prince
denial 2: Justin Timberlake & Tom Cruise
denial 3: Mike Meyers
denial 4: Snoop Dogg
guess
reveal 1
reveal 2

reveal 3
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Thursday, September 18, 2008

PPS. Taupe doesn’t need anger management, but she does need a stylist. And maybe a personality. Also not Katie Holmes. How can she be angry when they cut out that part of her brain?
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"Blowing Second Chances," it's not...

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

PPS. Blowing second chances is not Lindsay Lohan, though it totally could be. Also not Eva Mendes.


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Wednesday, September 17, 2008

PS. Rachel Weisz is not being managed.


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"Cheap & Crafty" revealed again

http://www.laineygossip.com/Rachel_Weisz_on_the_cover_of_Vogue_October_2008.aspx

Michelle is in New York this minute shopping at J Crew with Rachel Weisz. They’re trying on the same cords…or something.

Michelle is texting me from the change room I think. She has a new girl crush.

I get it…but then again I don’t want to. I remind Michelle that she’s, um, weird and thrifty. Michelle ignores me. Duana chimes in on the same text, ignoring me too, and tells Michelle to try on some other items from the catalogue they were both curious about.

This is my punishment last week for not being able to join them at the Brothers Bloom screening. They went, they saw, the loved. Not typical Wes Anderson. And Rachel is sublime.

Here she is, on the cover of the new Vogue, perhaps the magazine’s best cover all year. Also attached, a few extras of Rachel during the Bloom presser at TIFF. LOVE the pantsuit.

Conveniently, Darren Aronofsky was in town for the festival too. He came into the eTalk Lounge for an interview and accepted two boxes of cookies and baby clothes.

For Rachel’s Vogue article, click here.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 at 2:11 PM


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Tuesday, September 16, 2008

PPS. Uma Thurman is not blowing second chances. Uma’s got her sh*t under control.


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Tuesday, September 16, 2008

PS. Anger Management is not Jennifer Connelly.


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"Banning Bottles" reveal

http://www.laineygossip.com/Nicole_Kidman_goes_for_stroll_in_London_with_Sunday_Rose_.aspx?IsMicro=0

My Gwyneth took two years off when she had her babies. She was insufferable about reminding us, but she took two years off.

Before “birthing” Sunday, Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman made no secret of her desire to have a baby with Keith Urban. Even though she barely spent any time with first two children, she said she craved the opportunity to be pregnant, to be a mother again, and suffered greatly when she miscarried on more than one occasion. Such private details revealed in the most public fashion.

As you know, Granny got her surrogate wish. And she has celebrated Sunday Rose by going back to work immediately, non stop, in Australia and now in London for Nine with Daniel Day Lewis, Kate Hudson, Penelope Cruz, Marion Cotillard, and Fergie, all of whom were at the Madonna Wembley show last week while rehearsing, dancing, and training in the UK to prepare for their roles.

Can you imagine Granny? In a studio with those women? Those younger women and their younger bodies? Her poor cosmetic surgeon is probably being summoned for botox hits by the hour. And her poor husband must be banned from the set...which is probably a good thing. Keith isn't good with temptation.

Fortunately for the paps, in spite of her busy schedule, Gran found the time to take Sunday out for a stroll on Sunday touring the Royal Opera House in Covent Garden. She does have a rather grandmotherly air about her. Definitely closer to Goldie Hawn than to Kate Hudson, a sharp reminder that must be killing her every day.

Monday, September 15, 2008 at 6:18 AM


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Monday, September 15, 2008

PPS. Jennifer Aniston is not blowing second chances. Neither is Daryl Hannah.


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Monday, September 15, 2008

PS. Nicole Richie is not under anger management.

Anger Management
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