Net Neutrality!!

"Cash Only" clue

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22104/Smutty-Tingles-for-December-13--2011

Oh look. How close the paps came to Lindsay Lohan on the beach in Hawaii. She must have been really, really scared. (The Superficial)

December 13, 2011 at 12:17

Cash Only
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Celebrity/20042/Details/22053/Rachel-McAdams-needs-to-pick-up-her-career

I briefly mentioned this the other day in the article about Emma Stone - click here if you missed it. Duana and I have discussed this a few times lately: Emma Stone is what Rachel McAdams was from 2004-2007. The Wall Street Journal had a lengthy piece on how Rachel was the most sought-after, the most talked-about, the most promising actress. And then... it just kinda... fizzled. She’s not Lindsay Lohan or anything. They just... they let the momentum slip away.

Poor choices, or poor management? A combination of both?

It’s so disappointing. Because Rachel McAdams has that rare thing - women love her (don’t you love her?? I love her so much) and she’s not SJP, men are attracted to her, in that way Steve Carell described in Crazy, Stupid, Love: she’s so sexy and cute at the same. Also, she can act.

I don’t know what happened.

Morning Glory was... kind of a mess. And she was terrible in Sherlock Holmes 1. I couldn’t enjoy her either in Midnight In Paris, a film that’s on my Top 5 of 2011. She was the only weak link for me. Rachel? Yes, Rachel. Rachel who is one of my favourites.

This must change.

Will it be better this time for Sherlock 2? Here she is at the premiere last night. She apparently only has a cameo. Will it improve in The Vow? Oh la. I mean I know that a LOT of you will be seeing The Vow and crying, like Sasha, so it’s clear what The Vow will do for you. But what will The Vow do for her?

What will it do for her that The Notebook didn’t? (Gulp) Isn’t it like pressing reset?

Perhaps then the best hope is the Terrence Malick movie she shot earlier this year. The problem with a Malick movie is that he takes forever to put it out. Tree of Life was 5 years. She needs to start closing some other projects. Some interesting projects. Projects that remind everyone why she was the best part of The Family Stone which Duana reminded me of recently. She was GREAT in The Family Stone. God I want her to be great again.

December 7, 2011 at 2:32 PM

13 December 2011 Smutty Shout-Out
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Cash Only

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22123/Cash-Only-blind-riddle

SO easy.

Who was paid $15,000 in cash this week in exchange for frolicking around in her bikini on the beach? That’s a lot of cash money for you and me, true. But for them? It’s change. It’s really, really not much. In that world, it’s almost nothing. Consider that Tori Spelling supposedly charges at least 4 times that for a photo op with her kids and you get a sense of how low this piece of sh-t is scraping these days. She used to be able to throw that much away on a night out.

Oh and by the way, it had to be cash. She was super hard up for the cash. What are some of the things one might pay for in cash only?

December 14, 2011 at 1:58 PM

Update (12/15/11):

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"06 December 2011 Live Blog" clue 2

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22106/Weekly-Live-Blog-December-13--2011
Comment From AW
LAiney, one last clue on last week's liveblog riddle???

Lainey: Brooklyn.

December 13, 2011 at 12:59

06 December 2011 Live Blog
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22106/Weekly-Live-Blog-December-13--2011
Comment From Anais
Lainey, did you ever give a clue later on last week about the Blind Riddle you posted at the end of last week's LiveBlog?

Lainey: Anais - no meme.
December 13, 2011 at 12:59

06 December 2011 Live Blog
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http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22097/December-13--2011-Smutty-Shout-Outs

Have I ever told you about the sweetheart actress who keeps losing out on parts because her manager is a crazy bitch? She’s too loyal to leave her but no one wants to work with her representative. And she’s so blind to it she can’t figure it out.

December 13, 2011 at 8:52 AM

Update (2/15/12):

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"Doctor's orders" reveal 3

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22048/George-Clooney%E2%80%99s-girlfriend-loves-babies

George Clooney and Stacy Keibler were out for dinner last night in LA. Every pap in the city was there to shoot them. You know what I will always love about him though, no matter how frustrated I am with his girlfriend game?

I love how chill he is in these situations. I love that he doesn’t snarl, he doesn’t hide, he doesn’t whine, he doesn’t protest, he doesn’t threaten...and he remembers to tip the valet!

Straight up, George Clooney is a pro. He understands this is part of the life, this sh-t is what happens in exchange for everything else: Como, the money, the women, the access, the influence. When you choose Hollywood, when you choose the career George has followed, this is what you get. If George Clooney doesn’t cry about it, why are the 20 year old babies on tv shows crying about it??? Please.



As for Stacy, well, more and more it looks like she’s heading to the Oscars. Because HE is heading to the Oscars. Unless she f-cks it up. You know how you f-ck it up with George? You ask for a wedding and some babies. No no, Stacy hasn’t asked for those...yet. But she did post this on her Twitter with the caption:

My two loves...

Could be a nephew or a niece. Could be a friend’s kid. I’m just saying less has scared him away. You know how he is. She’ll have to make up for this baby picture with a nice firm headlock tonight.

December 7, 2011 at 10:53

Doctor's orders
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"06 December 2011 Live Blog," it's not...


http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22038/Weekly-Live-Blog-December-6--2011

Not Cumby. Not RDJ. Not Fassy.

December 6, 2011 at 1:00 PM

06 December 2011 Live Blog
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22038/Weekly-Live-Blog-December-6--2011

But yes, this is a serious actor.

December 6, 2011 at 1:00 PM

06 December 2011 Live Blog
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http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22038/Weekly-Live-Blog-December-6--2011

Would you still love him if you knew that he stomps around the set, holding up production, when his tea is brought to him at not the right temperature? (more...)

Would you still love him if you found out he delayed filming, and an entire crew, for several hours, because he HAD TO HAVE HIS LUNCH from a place that was off site so they had to drive there to get it and come back, only it was missing an ingredient and he sent it back?

Would you still love him if he refused to report to set after visiting wardrobe and found out someone else had been joking around with his hat and he insisted it wasn't sitting right on his head anymore?

December 6, 2011 at 1:00 PM

Update (12/13/11):

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"Three Weeks" reveal 2

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21970/Anne-Hathaway-and-Adam-Shulman-unofficial-but-totally-official-engagement-pap-photos

Anne Hathaway is engaged to Adam Shulman. One photographer was able to get clean shots of them and, most importantly, the ring in the park the other day in New York. It was a beautiful autumn day. The dog was with them. They were dressed casually but complimentarily, not too matchy matchy but also not clashy either. And, of course, totally oblivious to the fact that they were being photographed, right?

What?

Annie would never set up pap shots, please. Don’t be ridiculous. She also totally doesn’t care if Christian Bale’s heard about it yet. Maybe she told him at work.

So if this is how we’re kicking off this engagement, how might it end when the wedding comes around? Hathaway is favoured among designers. The dress will be a thing. Photographing it will be a thing. A Vogue cover? Perhaps. Valentino or Marchesa?

November 29, 2011 at 10:51

Three Weeks
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"Doctor's orders" reveal 2


http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21955/George-Clooney-spends-Thanksgiving-in-Mexico-with-Stacy-Keibler

Thanksgiving 2009, George Clooney spent it in Mexico with friends Rande Gerber and Cindy Crawford. Also his girlfriend at the time, Elisabetta Canalis. Click here to see the photos.

Thanksgiving 2011, there’s a new piece. But everything else stays the same. Even, almost, his outfit. Here’s George Clooney with his injured elbow in Mexico for Thanksgiving weekend with Stacy Keibler, hanging out with some other famous people including Alex Rodriguez who, I’m sure, George wouldn’t mind hosting for as long as he wants to stay.

As for that elbow...

How exactly was that elbow injured? This, perhaps, is what sets Stacy apart from the others. As a former wrestler, she may be able to go farther, more adventurously, if that’s your thing, than her predecessors. Strength wise, I guess, she could certainly take him to a whole new level of danger.

As mentioned in today’s site introduction, the National Board of Review will announce its list this coming Thursday. It was just two years ago, in 2009, when Elisabetta Canalis was presented to us, that Clooney’s last Oscar-hyped film Up In The Air won the NBR award for Best Picture and went on to several Oscar nominations, including one for Clooney, but was shut out of every category.

Some say Clooney has a much better chance this time with The Descendants. The Descendents has received some really impressive universal acclaim. I saw it again this weekend and, I mean, it’s a good movie, no doubt. Well written, well paced, beautiful chemistry, maybe a little obvious at parts, but heartwarming nonetheless. My problem with it however, and I thought maybe it would go away on the second viewing but it didn’t, is that George Clooney, it’s official...

He’s lost me.

I can’t watch a George Clooney movie anymore without seeing George Clooney. In other words, whatever he’s doing up there, I don’t believe him. I don’t believe George more than I don’t believe Brad Pitt. At least in Moneyball, I could go there with Brad Pitt as Billy Beane. This time in The Descendants, I couldn’t separate George Clooney from his character. You could argue that back in the day, in the days of Monroe and Taylor and Gable and the rest, that that was what defined the Movie Star. But back in the day, they went to the movies to see Movie Stars. People don’t go to movies for Movie Stars anymore. The Movie Star might even be dying. I wonder then if George and his increasingly archaic Hollywood playbook, I wonder how he’ll confront this truth as he moves forward with his career past 50 years old. It really might be time to move permanently behind the camera.

November 28, 2011 at 8:03 AM

Doctor's orders
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"They're creeping everyone out" clue

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Celebrity/21030/Details/21578/Rooney-Mara-covers-Vogue-with-David-Fincher%E2%80%99s-approval

It’s not just Rooney Mara ...

In the November issue of Vogue.

It’s Rooney Mara AND her creator David Fincher. Yes. I said creator. Read the article and see if you don’t feel the same way afterwards. One of the BEST Vogue celebrity profiles in a LONG, LONG time. So much better than the generic and safe Sarah Jessica Parker/Jennifer Garner/Jessica Biel pieces we get all the f-cking time in fashion magazines that don’t offer anything insightful, provocative, or, more appropriately, because it is a FASHION magazine after all, stylish.

We are approaching the release of the Fincher version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. This is Hollywood. By the end of their marketing strategy then, their goal is to make you forget about every other Lisbeth Salander you ever knew. Rooney Mara IS Lisbeth Salander. Because David Fincher commands?

Oh but it’s a fascinating relationship. In Daniel Craig’s words: “It’s f-cking weird!”

Hit me up after you read about how she looks at him. How she can’t camouflage, even in front of a journalist, her devotion to him, her consuming need for his approval. About everything. Even what she eats. The food control! He’s her food boss! He is comfortably her food boss, in front of someone who’s stated purpose in their presence is to be an observer and report back, there’s no denying he’s her food boss. Her everything boss.

Counter-thinking? Let’s behave like this on purpose to start a conversation? Like a distorted version of Blomkvist and Salander? It’s not like David Fincher is a stranger to a mind game. Sure. And if that was the intention, well, they did it really well. Because we’re supposed to see it through the writer. And the writer totally bought it.

Something about Fincher’s filmmaker’s approach though... I think this is legit. I think he’s control and order and with an actress of Rooney’s... inexperience, shall we say, this is exactly how he’s playing it. It is a 3 movie franchise, right? You could do worse for a mentor, I guess. It’s creepy and fascinating to me at the same time. Adds yet another dimension to the anticipation for this movie. Brilliant, non?

Anyway, I need to stop writing so that you can go off and read it. I promise. It’s a must. Including the part where Fincher explains why he didn’t cast Scarlett Johansson who supposedly threw down an amazing audition but... well... find out for yourself why she didn’t get the part.

Click here to read the piece and see more photos. Of course Anna Wintour chose the least interesting shot to turn into the cover.

October 17, 2011 at 11:59

They're creeping everyone out
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They’re creeping everyone out

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21923/They%E2%80%99re-creeping-everyone-out-blind-riddle

This director doesn’t have a reputation for engaging in tomfoolery on his sets, and this starlet has no reputation at all, yet they’ve been raising eyebrows with their vaguely off-putting relationship, which is inching into “professionally inappropriate” territory. Their weird fascination with one another is making some folks wonder if they could become a liability while promoting their film. She’s infatuated but he’s playing Pygmalion, a scenario that always ends messily. Someone should warn her, bless her little heart.

November 23, 2011 at 7:29 AM

Update (2/15/12):

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"Casting Couch" "the replacement" reveal 2

http://laineygossip.com/Lifestyle/Details/21505/Blake-Lively%E2%80%99s-ugly-ass-Marchesa-dress-at-Gossip-Girl-100th-episode-party

If you’ve been reading long enough, you know my feelings on Marchesa. I have hated Marchesa...forever. Like years. Some of my very fashionable friends, including Sasha, don’t understand this. They think Marchesa is the sh-t. I mean, sure, once in a while, once a year, someone might wear something Marchesa and it’ll be an anomaly but for the most part, Marchesa, to me, is tacky and gross, clothing for figure skaters who grew up to dance in Vegas.

And on that note, here’s Blake Lively at the Gossip Girl 100th episode party in New York on Saturday night wearing Marchesa. The definitive Marchesa. A dress that is totally indefensible. A dress that even Gisele Bundchen could do nothing with. A dress I have a hard time believing Blake, yes, even her, actually, seriously, picked for herself. So I’m wondering if there was a screenplay and an audition attached to it. That would be the only explanation.

November 21, 2011 at 6:56 AM

Casting Couch
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"Wife confronts colleague" clue

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Celebrity/20205/Details/18543/Julia-Roberts-praises-Natalie-Portman-in-Variety

Julia knows this Natalie

We were liveblogging last year’s Golden Globe Awards but would gladly have stopped after the best moment of the entire show happened on the carpet:

WHO’s NATALIE????????



See?

This is why you invite Julia Roberts. Everywhere.

While Julia may not have known that particular Natalie (Morales? Does it matter? Julia doesn’t KNOW HER. Do we need to?), she does know Natalie Portman. They were both in Closer, of course. I LOVED Closer. Here they are in 2007 when Julia received the American Cinematheque Award. Holy sh-t, Natalie looked young. She looks like the small town niece come to the big town for a dress up party. And Aunt Julia is very proud. So proud she wrote an open love letter for Natalie, Portman, in Variety:

"It is an interesting endeavour, watching a friend in a film. It is a risk to agree to write an article about a friend in a film. With someone like my subject today, Natalie Portman, it seemed worth the risk. She is always lovely, always watchable, always interesting. Then there is 'Black Swan.' If only I could reach out from the page now and offer you a glass of terribly good wine and ask you to sit a while.


Natalie Portman in the new film by Darren Aronofsky is a ballerina. I cannot think of anything more accurate and complimentary to say about her in this role: She is a ballerina! One is so lost in the aching beauty, the elegant moves and the quiet mania of her pursuits, she, Natalie, ceases to exist.
It is an intense and at times brutal film to watch. There were times when I was watching through tiny cracks in my quaking fingers. But to see her in this role was worth the one night of tossing and turning.


I, as many, first fell deeply in love with Natalie in Luc Besson's film 'The Professional.' A performance like the one she delivers in 'Black Swan' affirms that my professional admiration for her was well placed. Now as the years have kindly made her a li'l friend (that's a joke for Natalie), I am simply beaming with pride for her and want only to have her over to our home to hug her, tell her all the wondrous things we think of her, rub her weary feet and make her the biggest, most delicious dinner she could ever eat!"

So much amazingness in one short letter.

First, she boasts like I do. She was right about Natalie Portman. She wants you to know it. JULIA ROBERTS BELIEVED NATALIE PORTMAN COULD DELIVER LIKE THIS. No one else did.

Also...

She’s so tight with Portman, a lock for a Best Actress nomination, she has a nickname for her. That makes Julia cool and with it. And friends with everyone.

And... don’t forget... she’s happily married. “We” want to rub her feet, have her over to “our” place. It definitely isn’t subtle.

Just like it’s no secret who she’s voting for. Julia Roberts is not voting for Annette Bening.

November 29, 2010 at 8:53 AM

Wife confronts colleague
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http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21653/Wife-confronts-colleague-blind-riddle

A popular married television personality who’s also a chronic cheater had an affair a few years ago with a woman (also married with kids) who’s now become his colleague. The colleague ran into his wife recently. The wife decided they would have a little conversation. There were no pleasantries. The wife pretty much opened with - who did you have to f-ck to get this new position? How many people have you f-cked to get to where you are now? The colleague, obviously mortified, as they’re actually in a place crawling with parents and children, frequented by their own children, tried to be civil, tried to downplay the hostilities. No, the wife wasn’t interested in having a dignified discussion in public. She kept up her line of questioning about the colleague’s career mobility with pointed questions about how much time she’d spent on her back to get to where she is. The badgering continued, the wife was relentless, until the colleague rushed away. The wife is now boasting about the incident to all the ladies in the circle and beyond, convinced that the reason the colleague is getting so much play on the network these days is because she’s willing to give up so much play for the executives, the way she gave it up for her husband.

This isn’t the first time the wife has behaved aggressively. Her husband has pleaded with her to chill out when they’re in public as it could affect his reputation, like his constant dicking isn’t the major contributor to that. Still, her target right now is his colleague and the colleague’s reputation and she seems to be willing, happily willing, to share with anyone who asks how this colleague is earning all her jobs ...though I wonder if all that casting couching is enough since, you know, Julia Roberts didn’t seem to be aware.

October 25, 2011 at 8:53 AM

Update (10/25/11):
clue (regarding the Julia Roberts comment)
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"Ladies' Room Encounter with That Girl" reveal 1

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21643/Blake-Lively-and-Ryan-Reynolds-leave-his-Boston-apartment-on-his-birthday-weekend

Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds were photographed early Saturday morning leaving his Boston apartment with their dogs. The two were picked up by car service and taken to set where he’s working on RIPD. This just as Page Six reported that they were in New York last Thursday with Sandra Bullock at The Box for his 35th birthday. Blake’s rep, who is doing a really, really great job these days, found a source to tell the paper that Blake and Ryan were affectionate and coupley and holding hands. Someone else told the paper that they were accompanied by bodyguards?

Really?

When has that ever been his style?

No doubt, being with Leo, then playing Leo, or making it look like she played him and going straight to Ryan, no doubt that move has worked for Blake, has totally elevated her standing. But has it elevated Ryan’s? Initially, sure. To be chosen over Leo D can certainly help with the dick size, no doubt. Having your new girl personally deliver your birthday gift - click here to see - to set doesn’t hurt. But rolling with the personal security while she gets her personal paparazzi all up in their business? I dunno...

Here’s a dude who was married in the wilderness. Literally. He was photographed exactly 3 times during his entire relationship with his ex-wife. I’m just saying... how much is it helping him that he’s getting balled, and so obviously?

And how do you feel if you’re Scarlett Johansson? It’s over between them, totally. But she had some regrets. And now That Girl who kept hanging around, who kept waiting around for a crack, That Girl has now accessed the inside...

At Least That Girl isn’t the one who’s mean to you in the ladies’ room. It’s hard for me to feel sorry for her.

October 24, 2011 at 10:02

Ladies' Room Encounter with That Girl
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"Doctor's orders" reveal 1

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21610/George-Clooney-without-Stacy-Keibler-promoting-The-Descendants-and-Ides-of-March-in-London

George Clooney is in London today promoting The Descendants. Here he is at the photo call with Shailene Woodley. Last night it was the UK premiere of The Ides of March where he posed with Evan Rachel Wood. I guess he doesn’t need an escort in London?

Does Stacy Keibler have to check in with his people when she’s not on duty? Like, if she’s staying with him in his suite in London, at the Dorchester or Claridge’s or whatever, does she have to ask for a day pass? It’s like any business trip that your company pays for. It’s important to be conscientious about your personal time and whether or not it infringes on your professional time. Must not be a difficult challenge for Stacy because, like, she quotes Buddha on her Twitter and sh-t. This is the wisdom she dropped on us today:

"Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." - Buddha

I try to imagine her saying these things to George Clooney and I wonder if she delivers her lines before or after she puts the tie around his neck.

As for George, they did a good job with his blush and foundation today. He looks really, really well rested.

October 20, 2011 at 9:02 AM

Doctor's orders
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"Her kids were watching," it's not...

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21596/Intro-for-October-19-2011

As for whose kids were watching, thank you for all your emails, your judging, your huffing, and your tutting. I really, really love it. So interesting to me the difference in perspective depending on geography and cultural attitudes towards sex. It’s not Uma Thurman.

October 19, 2011 at 8:25 AM

Her kids were watching
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"Her kids were watching" clue?

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Celebrity/54/Details/21516/Gwyneth-Paltrow-and-Mark-Ruffalo-flirt-while-shooting-Thanks-For-Sharing-in-New-York

See now they’re only shooting a scene here on the New York set of Thanks For Sharing but, like, I totally buy that Gwyneth Paltrow would be into Mark Ruffalo and vice versa. The way she’s touching her mouth while they’re talking. The way they can’t stop smiling. The way she’s giving him a nice ass shot, “stretching” mid-conversation...

Works for me. Totally, totally works for me. They actually look really, really cute together.

What?

You don’t agree?

You hate her too much to agree?

I get that.

But can you arrive at a point where you might see that these two actors, accomplished ones, when they’re faking a relationship, make it more believable than when those useless Kardashian people do it and front like it’s for real?

October 11, 2011 at 9:26 AM

Her kids were watching
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21586/Her-Kids-were-watching-blind-riddle

and this is NOT about Kate Winslet

October 18, 2011 at 10:05

Her kids were watching
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http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21586/Her-Kids-were-watching-blind-riddle

Film set. Recently. She’s shooting a sex scene. Walking around set in her bra, no shirt on, panties, standard attire, nothing unusual about it...

Except that her children were there that day. They were visiting. And it was no thing, you know? That was her costume. They saw her in his costume while they were there. And then she sat them behind the monitor so that they could see her work and they watched while mom worked with another actor - she rubbed up against him, he returned the rubbing, she made love for pretend, for the movies, to a man that was not the father of her children, in front of her children.

I’m sure over 90% of you are all huffy and tutty about this and have been since the start of the 2nd paragraph. “It’s so inappropriate, it’s so bizarre, these people are sick f-cks”, etc etc etc. Me I’m still trying to decide. Part of me understands the huffing and the tutting. And the other part, well, it’s worth huffing and tutting over in real life, for civilians, because that’s simply not part of that world.

But take Kate Winslet for example - and this is NOT about Kate Winslet - who’s already been naked on screen several times, and her kids go to school with other kids whose parents have seen their mother’s breasts, and you realise, theirs is a totally different reality. And, given that that is the reality, if you are the subject of this riddle, do you prepare your children for it by bringing them with you, by showing them that this is not real, that this is what happens in filmmaking, that this is part of the process, that this is part of what’s considered their craft or their art, or whatever fancy word they’re using for it these days, that this is not dirty, that there’s nothing shady about it, in the hopes of removing or addressing in advance any stigma/embarrassment that might arise later...

Mommy is an Actor and this is what Acting is...

A part of me doesn’t disagree with that either, you know?

Anyway, I look forward to reading your emails.

October 18, 2011 at 10:05

Update (10/19/11):

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http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21573/Action-Homewrecker-blind-riddle

It’s not Scarlett Johansson.

October 17, 2011 at 9:45 AM

Action Homewrecker
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Action Homewrecker

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21573/Action-Homewrecker-blind-riddle

A marriage is over. A one year old baby will now grow up in a broken home. Because the dickhead of a father couldn’t resist the action star. He’s a crew member on her show, no one famous. She is the star of the show. And a major bitch. Was hated before she decided to f-ck up a family. Is even more hated now. Because she decided she had to have him, that’s it, never mind that he’s married and his wife had a baby not too long ago. They’d been carrying on for a while. Then, one day about a month ago, they were fooling around and his wife walked in. She ended it right away. And, well, being that she also works in the industry, she didn’t bother hiding why.

He, of course, thinks he’s in love. She on the other hand is still dealing occasionally with a number of past and current co-stars. This is not the first time she’s taken what she wants when it’s supposed to be unavailable. And every time she leaves a mess behind. I’m told she truly believes there’s a hierarchy in the business. That those who are on camera, as she is, and look the way she does - really, really beautiful - are unquestionably entitled to things, and that those who choose to work in the same field, lower on the food chain, in doing so also implicitly buy into the same ideology. One night, at a Hollywood party, when she was on hiatus, she apparently shared this with several people over dinner, speaking only to the men and not their wives who sat there open-mouthed as this bitch pretty much told them that if she decided to f-ck their husbands, they’d have to accept it as part of the world order. It’s not Scarlett Johansson.

October 17, 2011 at 9:45 AM

Update (10/17/11):


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Biohazard

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21565/Biohazard-blind-riddle

Here’s a gross one to kick off your weekend. If you’re prudey and squeamish, you may want to skip it.

We’re women. Sometimes the cycle, it’s hard to control. How many times have you heard someone complain that her holiday was happening right when the menses were too? (Menses is the MOST hilarious word to me, by the way. Because I’m immature enough to laugh about the fact that it’s so similar to Mensa. Anyway...)

Imagine then if your speciality was being naked on screen? And, you know, how that would work if you were on your period? And this is not a porn show. This, actually, is a critically acclaimed show. And one day, while shooting a nude scene, she walked on set with no clothes on and her tampon string clearly visible.

(I am warning you right now.If you just squealed, you need to stop reading this and move on. It’s about to get worse. Go.)

So of course they can’t shoot her with her tampon still inside her so, you know, in front of the entire crew, she pulls it out and drops it on the floor and asks the PA to pick it up and toss it for her. Which, um, is a biohazard, and you know, those PAs, their tolerance is high, but no, picking up used tampons is not part of the job. The bleeder reluctantly had to throw it out herself.

This is just one of many incidents that has resulted in her screen-time getting reduced. By the end of it, there’s a chance she could come back, but she’s certainly not being considered a mainstay regular anymore either.

Easy, right?

SO easy.

October 14, 2011 at 2:14 PM

Update (2/18/12):

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How much does she know?

http://www.laineygossip.com/How_much_does_she_know_Blind_Riddle_27sept11.aspx

She’s not with her boyfriend anymore and we’re to believe it ended amicably and for her sake, I hope so, but I’m not sure she would deal well with the fact that just a couple of weeks before their split was officially confirmed, he was on the road with someone else in his hotel room. The girl had the build he’s known to prefer - lean and muscular - and she answered the door wearing nothing but her underwear and her hands covering her breasts. Seemed very young. Didn’t seem uncomfortable and, you know, did what she told and was supposed to do while he lay in bed, naked, kinda ignoring her. She meanwhile kept walking around without her top on, like it was totally normal. And apparently it wasn’t the first time. All the time. For a long time. Which, for some reason, was a surprise to no one but his girlfriend, now ex, who never, ever, ever learns. Kinda like her successor, from another relationship, and why can’t we give these girls some better love vision???

Tuesday, September 27, 2011 at 10:15 AM

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Franchise Fat

http://www.laineygossip.com/Franchise_Fat_blind_riddle_written_by_Sarah_22sept11.aspx


Written by Sarah

He showed up the first time fit and fine but this time around he was rather round about the tum. The director noticed and was not happy, fearing for the consistency of the franchise. When asked to slim down, the slightly schlumpy star responded, “This movie isn’t worth it.” The trim-down request was rejected, and the show went on, but feelings were sore and things were a bit stiff until Sir Portly finished his scenes.

Thursday, September 22, 2011 at 8:01 AM



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"Boy Crazy" reveal 4

http://www.laineygossip.com/Cameron_Diaz_and_Gwyneth_Paltrow_have_dinner_together_after_Emmy_Awards_20sept11.aspx

Gwynnie helps Cammie control the crazy?


Cameron Diaz is not good with breakups. Cammie becomes That Girl. We all know a girl who’s That Girl. Or maybe we’ve all been That Girl. When I was 16 and a boy broke up with me for some bitch who looked like Reba McEntire, I drove to his house every night to see if she was over. She used to wear this really lame floppy hat and walk around asking people whether or not it “fazed” them. He was dumb enough to think that that was a really profound question. Obviously I’m totally over this.

In my defence, being 16 and dumped is one thing. Being Cameron Diaz, 38, and dumped and losing your sh-t is entirely another, especially when you so desperately want guys to think of you as the good time girl who comes with no drama and just loves to ride the cock.

Remember when Cam shrilled out on Justin Timberlake for almost an hour at a party after the Globes when she found out about Jessica Biel? I see this happening in public more and more. Adult women screaming in public like it’s not embarrassing at all. WHEN did it become not embarrassing? It will NEVER be NOT embarrassing. Please communicate this to everyone you know - via Facebook, via Twitter, your distribution list, please do it for real. Because I’m not sure enough people are actually aware.

Cameron Diaz certainly isn’t.

And if little Pipsqueak Timberlake with his half sack was able to turn her into a raging jilted cliché, imagine the impression ARod’s centaur of a package has left behind.

I’ve no doubt he f-cked her up. And she’s holding on, barely. And she may let loose on him, there may be another incident. Perhaps she shows up at one of his games, starts mouthing him off from the stands while he’s at bat. While the cameras are rolling. Um... yeah...it would totally be Good for Gossip, OF COURSE it would be.

Which must be why Gwyneth Paltrow is trying to kill our erection. Gwyneth specialises in killing your joy, non? Gwyneth hooked up with Cam for dinner after the Emmy Awards. As you know, they’ve been friends a long time. G is also, as you know, a life coach for many of her friends. She tells them how to make high class pizza and suffer through their husband’s infidelity. It’s a good influence for Cam. It’s a calming one. It means that we may not get the meltdown that would otherwise go down if G could mind her f-cking business; but that’s the kind of girl G is - she looks out for her (famous) friends.

Cam was apparently very happy and smiled a lot during their time together, showing no signs of residual crazy from when ARod left her. Knowing Gwyneth she’s probably already thinking of who to set Cam up with next. Garrett Hedlund?

Tuesday, September 20, 2011 at 8:23 AM

Boy Crazy
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(Click picture to see "bumps" more clearly)

http://www.laineygossip.com/Olivia_Wilde_looks_amazing_at_TIFF_premiere_of_Butter_in_Marchesa_dress_14sept11.aspx

This just might be the best

Olivia Wilde made her entrance at the VitaminWater pre-gala cocktail for Butter last night as I was shoving my face into all the neglected food. I was seated directly facing the elevator, the only entrance point to the venue.

When she stepped out in this white dress, the last to arrive, fully aware that she was totally hijacking the attention...

Well, as cliché as it sounds, in this case it truly applies: she was a vision.

It’s not only the gown. It’s how the wearer presents it.

She glided. She held her chin at just the right height. She had the perfect expression of serenity and seduction on her face. And, I mean, then there’s the dress itself.

I saw it twice last night, both at the cocktail and then several hours later at the InStyle party. In person, it’s INCREDIBLE. The way it moved you could almost feel it on your face - like silk with soft wind on a hot beach. Some of you may look at these photos and find it underwhelming especially after all this hyperbole. My friend Fiona is like that. If you tell her you really like a movie and the movie was so good, she’ll end up hating the movie because it was built up too much for her. The best thing to do when you’re telling Fiona about a movie is to be rather medium about it - “yeah, I liked it, it was ok” - and then when she sees it, she’ll turn the medium into amazing all by herself.

I suspect then, with all my gushing, some might be looking at Olivia Wilde’s dress and shrugging your shoulders. But I am telling you. If you saw it standing in front of you, if you saw its perfect, perfect shade of white, if you saw how the material was so exquisite it would at times appear to pleat and then the next moment become completely flat, if you could appreciate the long and elegant silhouette, I promise you we would all agree on this. All of us.

And, shockingly, it’s Marchesa. You know I very, very, very rarely like Marchesa. But this dress is f-cking crazy. And the styling worked beautifully. Neutral makeup, simple hair, SO stunning. This whole week I’ve seen her, she has been stunning.

But for real, I can’t stop thinking about this dress. And look how it makes everyone beside Olivia look really poor. Especially Ashlee Greene, always amateur hour. And it’s a Marchesa?!?

Wednesday, September 14, 2011 at 6:28 AM

TIFF skin problem
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Katie_Holmes_at_the_Emmy_Awards_2011_19sept11.aspx

When TIFF was winding last week and several of us sat around comparing notes and gossiping, as we always do after the festival, a few minutes of the conversation was devoted to a certain actress who looked spectacular in photographs, wearing what was truly an inspired dress, but who actually has a serious skin problem which you can see up close. It’s a massive layer of foundation covering her forehead and even then, the bumps underneath are quite noticeable.

Some things won’t go away even if you keep throwing money at them. And you’d be surprised, given how perfect they look so much of the time, how often UN-perfect they really are.

Monday, September 19, 2011 at 9:18 AM

Update (9/21/11):

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http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Carpenter_and_Julia_Stiles_dress_similarly_at_Emmy_Awards_2011_19sept11.aspx

Emmy ex-off: Jennifer Carpenter vs Julia Stiles

Did Michael C Hall actually go the Emmys? I’ve seen photos of him at an after-party but haven’t been able to find pictures of him at the show. Or perhaps I was preoccupied with shots of his ex-wife and his ex-lover dressed in similarly toned gowns. Grey-nude silhouette, hair down and wavy, one more tricked out than the other but overall it’s the same play, giving them even more in common than former lover and co-star.

I’ll give the edge to Carpenter who very rarely misses even though Stiles certainly deserves credit for her improvement. Do you remember her from the Golden Globes? Click here for a refresher. Goddamn that was bad. But she has a new boyfriend now. And he isn’t married. Some people figure it out quickly. Unlike Claire Danes who... I mean it took her a while and I worry that all the joy was taken from her and she can’t get it back. More on this later.

Monday, September 19, 2011 at 6:08 AM

About that breakup
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Claire_Danes_at_the_Emmy_Awards_2011_19sept11.aspx

Emmys Most Miserable: Claire Danes

I feel like whenever I see Claire Danes smile, she doesn’t really mean it. Duana asked the question during the liveblog last night - when was the last time Claire Danes threw her head back and laughed, heartily?

If you watched MSCL, you’ll understand the attachment we feel to her. And therefore the disappointment about what happened with Billy Crudup. It didn’t last, obviously, and it never does, and she’s with Hugh Dancy now (he did not attend with her) and they’re married and stable and she’s back on television and that’s all great and I hate to be bringing up this conversation - again - but I only do it because the toll that she took through it, it left some pretty visible and permanent scars. And I don’t just mean the stories that keep circulating about what a drunk mess she is at these events either...

I saw Dancy at TIFF several times last week. He’s very nice, he was relaxed and comfortable, seemed to have a great time catching up with friends. There was nothing smutty to report. But I will say there’s a noticeable difference in their demeanours. Where he is chill and loose, she’s seems withdrawn and, frankly, rather unhappy a lot of the time. Which is why she can’t come alive in this dress. This is a dress that could totally pop. Only Claire hasn’t been poppy in a long, long time.

Monday, September 19, 2011 at 6:21 AM

Clinging to love
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Twitter: Odour problem

http://twitter.com/#!/LaineyGossip/status/112280994517749760

Which young actor has an odour problem? #TIFF2011

9 Sep [2011] via Twitter for BlackBerry®




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"Three Weeks" reveal

http://www.laineygossip.com/Anne_Hathaway_and_Christian_Bale_work_on_The_Dark_Knight_Rises_in_LA_08sept11.aspx

While Ali Lohan’s busy trying to turn her face into Anne Hathaway’s, the real Anne Hathaway, inspired by Sabrina, was at work on the set of The Dark Knight Rises in LA. I love the name Sabrina. More people should be called Sabrina. Anne does Audrey a lot more convincingly than Jennifer Love Hewitt, non?

Christian Bale as Bruce Wayne was also shooting yesterday. It has been a while. He looks good. Really good. Not a skinny junkie which is my last recollection of him since The Fighter.

Very much looking forward to watching the chemistry between these two. Is it electric? Is it awkward? Is it awkward because it’s electric? TDKR is due out July 20, 2012. Is it July yet? Once the liveblogs come back after TIFF, we should discuss your expectations. Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man was great until the third installment. If anyone can avoid the 3 curse though, it’s Christopher Nolan.

Thursday, September 08, 2011 at 1:50 PM

Three Weeks
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Poll Results: Three Weeks


Three Weeks


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"She learns for him, will not leave him" reveal

http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Garner_Ben_Affleck_expecting_third_child_23aug11.aspx

Matt Damon was married in 2005. His daughter Isabella was born 6 months later. Ben Affleck was married in 2005. His daughter Violet was born 6 months later. Matt Damon has 4 children. Ben Affleck is on his way to 3. So far both are fathers of girls only. I suppose it’s not uncommon for lifelong friends to follow similar paths.

As announced yesterday late afternoon, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner are expecting. Their publicist confirmed the news via the Associated Press. Every few months or so, even before JLo left Marc Anthony, people always call for an Affleck/Garner split. It’s been happening for years. The rumours they come from gossip columns, tabloids, and even locals in Boston about how the two are on the verge of separation. For that to be true, we would have to accept that offside behaviour automatically results in a breakup. It’s a naive standard. How many times have you seen, in real life, not even in Hollywood life, the “In Spite Of” situation?

I will stay with her in spite of...

I will stay with him in spite of...

What makes you think that for a celebrity, when so much pride is at stake, and publicly, that it would be any different?

Jennifer Garner worships Ben Affleck. There was NEVER a possibility that he was leaving, and there was never a possibility that she would leave him. Remember these photos of the two at the Critics’ Choice Awards in January? It’s not even Photo Assumption, it’s ANY assumption that says she hangs on his every word. Always has. As for when this baby is due...

They won’t say, it’s never been their style. But... if there’s any celebrity who’d actually throw one of those gross Gender Reveal parties that I told you about yesterday, I feel like it would be Taupe.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011 at 6:45 AM

She learns for him, will not leave him


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She learns for him, will not leave him




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http://www.laineygossip.com/Smutty_Tingles_16aug11.aspx

I don’t believe for a second that Robert Pattinson wants a fashion line. But I do believe that Kellan Lutz would lie-pimp him out there to sell his own (Celebedge)

Tuesday, August 16, 2011 at 10:59 AM

Producer after producer
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"Three Weeks" clue

http://www.laineygossip.com/Christian_Bale_wears_The_Fighter_uniform_everywhere_10jan11.aspx

Are you wearing that to the Oscars?

Christian Bale seems to be into wearing only training jackets during promotion for The Fighter. Here he is, all dressed up, arriving at the Writer’s Guild of America for a screening of The Fighter the other day. Dude, we get it, you’re Method.

The Director’s Guild of America just announced their top 5 today: Darren Aronofsky for Black Swan, Tom Hooper for The King’s Speech, David Fincher for The Social Network, Christopher Nolan for Inception, and David O Russell for The Fighter. So both Nolan and Russell edged out the Coen brothers’ True Grit. Very, very interesting. The DGA has traditionally been the most slamdunk of Oscar predictors. So… we’ll have to see when the Academy announces its nominations 2 weeks tomorrow.

As for Bale, well, he’s the frontrunner, probably the lock, in the Best Supporting category. Have you seen The Fighter? He is SICK ridiculous great in The Fighter. Especially when they show footage from the real guy at the end. I have to say, I liked that movie a lot more than I thought I would. In fact, I really, really liked it a lot more than I thought I would. Even Amy Adams. One of my favourite parts was when the roughneck sisters come for a visit and they all throw down and pull hair on the porch. Please. I will NEVER complain about a roughneck bitch fight in a film.

Anyway, if you’ve seen The Fighter, you might be interested in the video below about the accuracy of the final bout. It’s movie footage with real footage. Amazing.

Monday, January 10, 2011 at 1:15 PM

Three Weeks

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http://www.laineygossip.com/Emily_Blunt_and_John_Krasinski_spend_weekend_in_Vancouver_with_Matt_Damon_15aug11.aspx

Must have been what Matt Damon and his wife Luciana told Emily Blunt and John Krasinski. And they accepted the invitation to visit them in Vancouver. Here are Emily and John leaving Vancouver on Sunday after a few days in Canada with her Adjustment Bureau co-star. They’ve been hanging out a lot the four of them after shooting that movie together. In New York quite often, and now in Vancouver where Matt’s been working on a new film for a couple of months. Emily and John stayed with the Damons at their rental property; it’s a close friendship. Let’s come back to this in a minute.

Earlier in the day, before leaving for their flight, Matt took Emily and John up the Grouse Grind. He finished well before they did. They were spotted taking the tram back down together though and graciously posed for fans who eventually recognised them.

So you know who hasn’t come to visit the Damons in Vancouver? Not that it means anything but the Afflecks haven’t come to visit the Damons in Vancouver or in New York. Or Miami. At least not in a while. They used to couple-trip all the time. Of course they all have kids and it’s harder to move them all around and break up a routine. Still, their approach to down time is rather different. Hypothetically, if you knew all kinds of secrets about your husband’s best friend, would you have a hard time hanging out with his wife?

Also attached - Emily and John holding hands upon arriving at LAX.

Monday, August 15, 2011 at 7:50 AM

Cuba

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http://www.laineygossip.com/Intro_15aug11.aspx

A couple gets papped every day leading up to a pregnancy announcement - coincidence or conspiracy? Do babies make a man faithful?

Monday, August 15, 2011 at 6:55 AM

That didn't take long


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"a Friend's Couch" reveal 2

http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Lopez_and_Marc_Anthony_spotted_together_in_Long_Island_a_month_after_divorce_announcement_1.aspx

Marc will be grovelling


TMZ posted photos yesterday purportedly of Marc Anthony with Jennifer Lopez in Long Island. As you know, she was the one who pushed forward with the break and the announcement. He was trying to hold on. And he still wants to hold on, supposedly in touch repeatedly, at times soft and pleading, at other times hostile, accusatory, and borderline abusive. Getting together for the children sounds like the perfect time to work her down, see if she’ll change her mind.

But here’s how JLo’s publicist responded when TMZ asked for comment about the sighting:

"They are NOT back together -- they were just visiting each other and the children."


I like the capitalisation of NOT. Like, not only were they setting the record straight, but they really, really, REALLY want to set the record straight. That they are NOT BACK TOGETHER. Like the mere suggestion of it is absurd. Like, as if JLo would ever. Which is in line with her publicity playbook since the split, strategically positioning herself in the most sympathetic light without going full victim.

Right now though, the way these patterns work, Marc will be at his best, his most charming, his most romantic, his most appealing. Can JLo keep saying no? Who could she reach out to to help her? Please. If only Gossip could be written like a script.

Thursday, August 11, 2011 at 8:16 AM

a Friend's Couch


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http://www.laineygossip.com/Smutty_Tingles_06jan11.aspx

Was he there for a post break bootycall? Or is he moving his sh-t out? (Celebuzz)

Thursday, January 06, 2011 at 11:09 AM

One line or two lines


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She learns for him, will not leave him

http://www.laineygossip.com/She_learns_from_him_will_not_leave_him_blind_riddle_10aug11.aspx

So much speculation and it’s been going on for years that she will finally leave him because he simply won’t, ever, change. But do you know the lengths she went through to get him, and keep him? Did you know she enrolled in classes at university, not because she was interested for herself, but because she wanted to be able to talk to him about...things? She wanted to be able to keep up. She wanted HIM to know/believe/think she could keep up. She worships his brain. She wanted to make sure that he was finding her brain adequately stimulating.

They say that he’s been trying to get out of there. He hasn’t tried. There has been no attempt. It’s kinda futile. First because, even if he were to want to bail, everyone in his life would be against it, and has warned him of the consequences, but also because she has told him straight up, on several occasions, “I will never leave you”. This one doesn’t get enough credit for her tenacity.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011 at 8:38 AM

Update (8/23/11):


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http://www.laineygossip.com/Tom_Brady_has_better_hair_looks_hot_at_training_camp_with_Patriots_04aug11.aspx

Tom Brady's hair is much better than it's been in a while. Check him out training with the Patriots yesterday. Yay that the league managed to work things out for a new season! This is for Sarah from Cinesnark whose hard-on for him had been waning. Looks a lot hotter, non?

It's all love and peaches right now at training camp for the Patriots as they're just beginning their honeymoon with Chad Ochocinco. But don't get huffy when I say that everyone not on the bandwagon is wondering how long that is going to last. Some personality problems are incurable over the long term. They say that the New England system fixes attitude. Forever? Maybe that's just my Miami Dolphin allegiance coming through. You can imagine then how choked I am now that Marc Anthony owns part of my team, all things considered, couch quarterback aside. Come on, that one was obvious, wasn't it?

If not for Miami though, I'd rather see the Patriots take the AFC East over the New York Jets. Not only because that's Jacek's team, but also because I hate Rex Ryan.

Thursday, August 04, 2011 at 1:44 PM

a Friend's Couch
 
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Intro_03may11.aspx

PS. Click here for your chance at $100 in Biore© product and a riddle about whether or not weight loss comes with memory loss. Easy right?

Tuesday, May 03, 2011 at 4:49 AM


Sponsored Tingles: Reveal The Dirt - Week 4


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http://www.laineygossip.com/intro_29apr11.aspx

PS. Three teleprompters? How many points is that? Click here to Reveal The Dirt with Biore© and win $100 worth of product.

Friday, April 29, 2011 at 1:21 AM


Sponsored Tingles: Reveal The Dirt - Week 3


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http://www.laineygossip.com/intro_26apr11.aspx

PS. She can’t stand it when someone else is smaller, and she also desperately hates her hair colour but can’t change it because of that contract. Click here to Reveal the Dirt with Biore for your chance to win $100 in product.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011 at 6:30 AM

Sponsored Tingles: Reveal The Dirt - Week 2

 
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Index.aspx?DateTo=4/25/2011&DateFrom=4/18/2011&StartIndex=8

PS. This week’s Reveal the Dirt contest – have you entered? Click here and let me know about the girl with the most talent and the biggest projection but who secretly just wants to be the prettiest and the thinnest.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Sponsored Tingles: Reveal The Dirt-Week 2



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"Producer after producer" red herring 1

http://www.laineygossip.com/Kellan_Lutz_compliments_his_own_body_even_though_he_cant_sing_29jul11.aspx

I snarked on Kellan Lutz a couple times yesterday because, obviously.

He is more insufferable to me than ever since Comic-Con. And, you know, if I were him I’d be a little more careful about that secret because it’s no longer a secret anymore. Anyway, my friend Scott in New York, seeing that I was sh-tting on Kellan, being the bitchy, encouraging person that he is, sent me a scan from a recent issue of Us Weekly with an interview of Kellan Lutz. This was his note in the email:

“I've been meaning to send you this. Took a photo on my phone from US weekly maybe a month ago (?). It's an interview with Kellan Douche. WHO answers a question like this?!!”

Here’s the question:

What’s it like being a sex symbol.

Wait!

Don’t open the image yet. Just, just imagine how Kellan Lutz would answer it. Just imagine how he would process it. Remember this is the Jerry Curl who once POSED IN A TREE WITH A BOOK for the paps. Think about how a person like that might respond to that question.

You ready?

Anything you came up with isn’t anywhere near what he put out there.

Q: What’s it like being a sex symbol?

Kellan Lutz: I thank God for blessing me. I can’t really sing, I can’t play guitar but he gave me a physique, which is nice.

As Scott said: Who answers a question like this??!!!

That’s Hollywood, right? They say sh-t, sh-t like this, and NO ONE calls them on it. The people who DO call them on it are banished from the circle. I wonder then how Kristen Stewart handles Kellan Lutz. What she says to him at work the next day about those tree posing book shots. What she must think of him when she reads quotes like this one, how she must have to stop herself from sneering behind his oiled, toned back.

Attached – Kellan earlier this week at a party in New York. You know, the organisers at some of these events usher him in like he’s A List level Brad Pitt. I hate people.

Friday, July 29, 2011 at 8:36 AM

Producer after producer
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Index.aspx?DateFrom=4/11/2011&DateTo=4/18/2011

PS. Win $100 worth of Biore® product plus movie passes if you know your smut! Come on, this one was easy. Both made headlines this week - one for not being careful, and the other for finding a new home. Click here to enter!

Friday, April 15, 2011

PS. Did you enter the Reveal the Dirt contest yet? $100 in Biore© product plus movies passes. Click here for the details and the first clue. All you have to do is tell me who went up and down on each other a few years ago, as both are curiously in the midst of pregnancy speculation at the same time. Easy, right? Also there’s another chance to win on Wednesday with one of my favourites from the gossip hall of fame. That one, however, won’t be so obvious. Study up!

Monday, April 18, 2011


http://www.laineygossip.com/Benicio_del_Toro_and_Kimberly_Stewart_having_a_baby_but_not_together_.aspx

It’s the best recent randomness:

Benicio del Toro’s people have confirmed exclusively to Life & Style (because they went through her garbage and found the pregnancy test? Or because People Magazine wouldn’t pay her?) that he and Kimberly Stewart are having a baby. Jude Law is all like, sh-t that could have been me. And you know Jude. It TOTALLY could have been him.

Have you read the official statement?

Take a look:


"Kimberly is pregnant. Benicio is the father and is very supportive. Although they are not a couple, they are looking forward to the arrival of the baby."

I really love that she had to specify that her client and Kimberly “are not a couple”. So… translation…

You had drunken sex one night without a condom?

Of course of course, taking responsibility is important. Of course it is. Especially when no responsibility was taken in the first place.

Attached – Benicio last month in Havana shooting a movie. Yes that’s Josh Hutcherson, the new Peeta, beside him. This is kinda what Benicio would have looked like when he and Kimberly had sex and made their baby.

Monday, April 11, 2011 at 11:21 AM


http://www.laineygossip.com/Scarlett_Johansson_moves_in_with_Sean_Penn_.aspx


Scarlett moves in

Laura just emailed me:

I’m having…
A really hard time understanding the Scarjo/Penn thing. Usually I can rationalize these odd pairings some way, but this one is beyond me. What is it she’s looking for? An older man? He doesn’t have his sh-t together - he’s NEVER had his sh-t together.


Rebound sex? She could have that with hotter men.


Meaningful conversations about the state of the world? There are more intelligent people to consult.


This is what I’m thinking about today……for no apparent reason.

Jacek meanwhile is on the phone with his buddy Jamie, discussing the Vancouver Canucks defensive strategy tonight when they open Round 1 of the playoffs against the defending champion Chicago Blackhawks who limped into the post season. Now is when our season tickets pay off. We have tickets through the finals. You can imagine then, it’s all Jacek can think about. But does it really matter, sports, in the grand scheme? Does it matter any more than Scarjo and Sean Penn? No. So why do we get maligned for talking about celebrities? Don’t take that sh-t, gossips. Don’t.

Tangent aside…

I wrote back to Laura that it’s because Scarlett is essentially a CHILD. And, as children do, or very immature young women, pretending to be mature women, they hero-worship older men. Even if those older men have a history of alarming behaviour. Evan Rachel Wood? Meet Scarlett Johansson. But hey! Sean Penn has an Oscar and lived in a tent in Haiti! Of course she’s f-cking him. And of course he’s swaggering around like it’s 1985 again with one of the hottest girls in Hollywood.

But never forget…

When you’re in a relationship with Sean Penn, Sean Penn is always #1. Even Madonna had to observe that rule. Good luck with that Scarjo.

Anyway, Us Weekly reports that they’re now homebodies, and enjoy exercising together, and staying home with his kids like they’re all the supporting cast in the movie in his head about his life.

We’ve all been dumb at love. Scarlett is having her dumb love moment.

But my favourite, favourite part of this story is not so much the story than one of the comments that was left on the Us Weekly page about the story by someone called Elizabeth:


Such a pig. She broke up with Ryan what, a few months ago and now she's living with this jerk? Obviously, she cheated on Ryan. Guess she learned absolutely nothing from her role as a cheater in 'He's Just Not That Into You'. Ryan's so much better off without her. Cheaters are the scum of the earth.

And you wonder why I don’t allow comments.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011 at 12:26 PM

Sponsored Tingles: Reveal The Dirt - Week 1


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http://www.laineygossip.com/Scarlett_Johansson_and_Javier_Bardem_filming_in_Spain.aspx

All Men ...

Flock to Scarjo.

Justin Timberlake, Ryan Reynolds, Woody Allen wishes, Benicio del Toro in an elevator, and now co-starring with Javier Bardem. Here they are shooting in Spain. I really want them to be doing it…is that pervy?

Monday, July 30, 2007

Sponsored Tingles: Reveal The Dirt - Week 1


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"Three Weeks," it's not...

http://www.laineygossip.com/Colin_Firth_did_a_bad_accent_before_on_Saturday_Night_Live_28jul11.aspx

Also, this was just an excuse to tell you that Colin and Cameron Diaz are NOT the subjects of Three Weeks & a Friend’s Couch Part 1. That’s a really good guess though.

Thursday, July 28, 2011 at 7:36 AM

Three Weeks

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"a Friend's Couch" clue

http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Lopez_enjoys_freedom_from_Marc_Anthony_on_a_yacht_in_Miami_25jul11.aspx
JLo is free

Jennifer Lopez spent the weekend in Miami, part of it luxuriating on a yacht in a bikini, ready for the next after formally announcing her divorce from Marc Anthony. It's freedom. And relief. And, for us, it's as you've all been agreeing, very good for gossip. This is the most you've cared about her in years.

Comic-Con is a great place to catch up on gossip with sources and compare stories. And at Comic-Con everyone agreed on two things: Justin Timberlake is a twat, and Marc Anthony was not kind to his wife; bitter with insecurity and paranoia, stressed by financial anxiety, and frustrated with the fact that he didn't marry a woman who was content to be quiet and sit by his side, a trophy with a legendary ass.

Marc wanted JLo for a long time. When she finally accepted his advances, he tried to own her. And she was down with that...until she remembered that's not how she was built.

By all accounts she is happy to be without him. And while for the sake of their children they'll try to keep it civil, she also doesn't mind it if the people around her start talking. Loudly. Not just because this is the game she plays but also because she knows she's coming out of her third marriage, she's aware of the reputation, and for whatever reason she wants people to know that it's not that she didn't try, or that she was frivolous about the decisions leading up to and during and after their marriage, but because the marriage became totally unworkable for her, or anybody, regardless of celebrity. Craftily too, she wants women to be able to identify with what's she coming out of, without actually stepping up herself to name what it is.

Since January, when Idol made her relevant again, JLo's career has been on an upward trajectory. It has been boosted undoubtedly by the split, but in order to sustain that, she cannot be seen as a 40-something year old woman who was simply bored by her husband and looking for a younger celebrity boyfriend. Yes it will be super smutty and intriguing to follow what her dating situation is going to be now. But equally as smutty and intriguing will be observing the management of the Freedom of the JLo. We're seeing the beginning of the rollout now.

Ps. How can you see JLo on a boat and not think of Ben?

OMG.

I was just trying to turn the ass-touching part from Jenny From The Block into a gif stumbled across this fan video instead. Behind the scenes when they were shooting. Bennifer. Like, all over each other.

Please.

This will MAKE YOUR AFTERNOON.



Monday, July 25, 2011 at 11:37 AM

a Friend's Couch


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http://www.laineygossip.com/Three_Weeks_and_a_Friends_Couch_blind_riddles_27jul11.aspx

Two separate riddles here...

1. It was instant attraction when they started rehearsals, despite the fact that he’s supposed to be happily married. On set flirtation, some touching in the trailer, soon became after work “prep time”, and heavy petting in the car, and before long it was a full blown affair. May have been a method situation for him, which would surprise no one, but for her, even though she told herself this was a big girl, mature woman thing to do – take a co-star lover – of course she fell in love, although she obediently went back to her boyfriend and tried to shake it off he cut it off after three weeks as soon as his wife came over to stay. He seems to be able to pretend like it never happened. Which, naturally, is confusing her because she thought it was so real. Of course she did. As it happened, there was a break in the schedule and they haven’t had to work together for a while, much to the studio’s relief. These are big names on a big film with big expectation and there was already enough drama last time around. But shooting with everyone resumes again in a few days, and they’ll be sending an executive to stay around through the stretch to keep a close eye. Babysitting is exactly what it is.

2. Here’s a story her side has been working hard to put out there: that one night he hurt her so badly she had to leave and because she’s so famous, and was so distraught, a hotel wasn’t an option. So she drove herself – a crazy notion in and of itself – to a friend’s, and actually slept on the couch, also hard to believe. But home was supposedly not a safe place for her that night. This is why they’re helping her make a new one.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011 at 7:32 AM

Update (2/29/12):
# 1: Three Weeks
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4
  

# 2: a Friend's Couch
clue
reveal 1
reveal 2
 

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